How to Stop Jacking Yourself Up
Watching my kids attempt a 5 piece kids puzzle was the hardest thing to do at first. Watching them try to jam the pieces in and completely miss the parts that looked alike was sooo frustratingš¤š¤š¤. I would often get up and leave so that they would try to learn on their own, only to see and hear their frustration. "Momma!!! Momma!!! Help me!! I can't do it!" I had to check myself quickly and go help my baby. Oh the lessons of persistence and patience.
Getting the word of God in my heart was the most important part of my relationship and walk with Him. When my kids got upset with their puzzle I immediately looked at my college Statistics book, then my sink full of dishes, and over to my stack of bills. This, this was my puzzle. Life. Those are just small examples of what constitutes my life. I often don't know where to begin, or even how to start. Often things don't match up or make since. But there I was screaming to God, in my mind of course, "God, God, help me, I can't do it!"
In the back of my mind I always know that if I couldn't figure out the bigger picture He can. But I want my gazillion piece puzzle to be figured out as quickly as my kid's 5 piece puzzle. I don't want to have to wait around to figure out why or to see the bigger picture. I used to watch the patients and mental health gather to complete a thousand piece puzzle together. The puzzle will often take them days. There was a sense of determination and competition of getting it done. They would do the puzzle during their meal times and in between the group therapy. It seemed to have brought them together and brought about some really great conversation. And once the puzzle was complete there was a great sense of pride in everyone and a sense of sadness because it was finally finished. It was the journey of getting the puzzle together and the satisfaction of seeing that bigger picture.
I hope you are seeing where I am going. When we try to rush or slam the pieces of lifeĀ that don't belong or even make sense together, we miss the keys. We miss the journey. We miss the relationship with God or other people. We miss the experiences, and sometimes the peace. We miss moments of life. We jack ourselves up.
How can I be frustrated with a toddler who has never had to put things together in his life before?Ā This is is the beginning of his life of trying to get it together.Ā And the truth is, we are possibly at the beginningsĀ of some puzzles of our lives. Figuring everything out, and fast, is the way of the world. We know that this is not the way God intends some things to be.Ā
A prayer for patience:
Galatians 6:9Ā
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.
Dear Lord,
Thank you for all of the events that lead up to this. You are the author and finisher of my faith. I do not understand what you are doing all of the time, so I ask for patience, wisdom and guidance. I don't mean to be impatient about this situation. I have an anxiety that I am asking and willing for you to remove from me. In due time I have faith that you will allow me to see your promise, if it is your perfect will. Open my heart to be more grateful for the things you are doing. I thank you for it all.
Amen